Longing For More? 4 Steps To Help You Figure Out What Is Missing In Your Life
By Crystal Kulpcavage
I know it well and I don’t like it. It feels like a nagging longing from within that intensiﬁes and retreats. Intensiﬁes and retreats. Every time you think it’s gone, it shows up again, occupying every nook and cranny in your mind.
Sometimes it manifests as a dissatisfaction in the major areas of your life. It can feel like you chose the wrong career, a spouse that doesn’t understand you, an unwelcoming neighborhood to raise your family. Sometimes it manifests as an intense pressure to perfect every part of your life, to please everyone you know. Rarely does it allow you to slow down and ﬁnally enjoy what you’ve created for yourself, content with who you are and what you’re doing.
And the guilt… that’s another energy drainer. There were times I looked at my life and felt so guilty for wanting more, for not being satisﬁed. I had it so much better than so many others. Yet, there I was, frustrated with my lack of clarity, not knowing what to do or try next, exhausted from prior attempts and prior disappointments. But, I just couldn’t let it go. That nagging feeling is relentless. What could I be missing? Did I have the energy or motivation to make any more changes? I already had enough on my plate.
If you ﬁnd yourself feeling like there’s got to be more to life, but you just don’t know what that is, you’re not crazy. And you do deserve more. The trick is, the path just may not be quite what you expected it to be. Here are a few tips to get you started:
Get to know yourself – This may sound obvious, but you’d be surprised how many people really do not have a clear idea of who they are, what they value, what they like and dislike, what their strengths are or how to communicate those strengths.
Start asking yourself real questions and allow yourself to provide the real answers. It’s time to get to know yourself on a deeper level. What do you value most? What did you love to do as a child before you cared about being liked and accepted? What do people come to you for help with now? What makes you tick?
Take a basic inventory of your daily routine. How often are you engaging in activities that you love, activities that support your values and strengths? How often are you showing up as the person you really want to be? The gap between who you are being and who you really want to be is what needs to be addressed.
Focus on your energy and mindset – We need an ample amount of energy and motivation to approach life from a new angle.
Add in some healthier habits to increase your physical energy. More rest, water, fresh air, exercise and nutritious food. Less tasks that drain you. Exhaustion is the archenemy of clarity and change.
Your thoughts are either working for you or against you. Focus on creating a strong, positive and conﬁdent mindset that will lead you through whatever challenges lie ahead.
Try and try again – I wish things could get easier just by thinking about them, but we need to get moving and try new options on for size in order to understand what we really want. Take on new experiences. Step outside of your comfort zone. Reﬂect on what you’ve learned and how you feel as a result. Repeat until you’ve found something worth keeping.
Get support – On the surface, none of these tips appear to be daunting, but if the answer was simple, let’s be real… you’d have it by now. Some of us stay stuck in this place for years upon years. The truth is, there are lots of pitfalls you can get trapped in and the easiest and most efﬁcient way through this is to get support.
Sometimes we are very focused on one issue only to ﬁnd out that was never the root cause of our frustration. An objective opinion from a professional skilled in this area can be invaluable.
Creating a supportive mindset and sustainable energy level often requires more than sheer determination. Knowledge in this area is key.
It’s not always easy to stay focused and dedicated to this type of work when we have other responsibilities pulling us away from it. Strategies to prioritize your tasks and external accountability to keep you on your toes will also help.
You deserve a life and a career that energizes you, something that is aligned with the essence of who you really are and what you value. You deserve to feel appreciated. You deserve to be able to sit on your butt once in a while and just take it all in. The question is… What are you going to do to get yourself there?
Crystal Kulpcavage, MBA, CPC, ELI-MP, RM empowers professionals to get out of their own way and create fulﬁlling lives and careers with ease. Crystal is a certiﬁed core energy leadership coach, an inspiring speaker, a life and career/business strategist, a Reiki Master and energy healer, a former software engineer and corporate leader, and a business owner.
SeekingASenseofPurpose.com Your Life. Your Dreams. Your Terms. No Regrets.
Would you like to receive more personalized direction? Stop by Crystal’s booth at the Guts and Glory Expo and ask her questions about your particular situation. This can be the day when everything changes.